Music appreciation

One benefit of being a dog is never having experienced the music of Kansas in the 70's, or now as a "classic" artist. How long to the point of no return? About four minutes of song longer than a reasonable point of tolerance.  If dogs had classic radio stations would they include barks of other dogs?  Or would they play "Who Let the Dogs Out" non-stop?

Opposable thumb issue #287

Dogs can't hold a towel to wipe their feet. 

Life as a dog featurette #5

Life as a dog means never eating a slice of pie, unless the owner isn't looking and a food grab is in order.

Makin' a case

Story about re-population.  Since God put the goods all in the same place per gender it makes it easier for all to re-populate, including dogs, who even have their own style.  Also makes it more possible for the under-smart to do the same in the trailer court of the world.  Result is a spike in Wrestle-Mania pay per view purchases last night, while real joys of living, Scott toilet paper, were passed over for the cheap stuff.  Contention at the extreme is the parts should possibly have been randomly located, not in the same place on each person, to confuse the stupid at time of sexual advancement.  In a stunning revelation this could have impacted the world in many ways.  1)  Less NASCAR.  2)  Smaller NRA membership.  3)  Fewer Republicans, possibly substantial reductions.  4) Many more Mormons proportionately.  5)  No Tea Party.  6)  National Enquirer tabloid does not exist.  7)  Less reality TV.  8)  Right-wing politicians who stand up for the rights of those not in agreement with the Christian agenda as a policy outline for America.  9)  One more "Dummy" book.  10)  Monsters as a real-daily-threat, living among us, posing as friends, scaring dogs.

Weekend forever

Enjoy the weekend so far?  The dog has been living a perpetual weekend since the day it was born.  People think they score points for getting to the weekend.  For a dog weekends are the endless loop of "It's a Small World" but pleasant.

The 16th minute

It is standard human behavior.  Dogs are not affected by the same hype.  Morning talk-shows, the 7:30 entertainment shows, tube sites on the internet all benefit from the shiny coin and its 15 minutes of fame.  Caring less, the dog community.  Brings to mind what has happened in minutes 16 and beyond of fame for golden-voiced homeless man Ted Williams?  Like a "poof" in the Wizard of Oz, he was there one minute and melted by water the next. 

Fooled?

Every day can be April Fool's Day for a dog.  They are suckers for the fake ball throw.  They don't know it is really in the armpit or behind the back.  Typically they will take the bait on a promise.  Let's go for a walk - when none is intended.  Best April Fool's day pranks involve a combination of a premise rooted in reality but pushed to absurdity.  Like a typical animal, chicken, but with purple feathers.